thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
