I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bed smells like the plague
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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