The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Randomize