At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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