Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Randomize
