My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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