one might say we're banned from that church
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Randomize
