i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize