nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
