Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
