found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
