What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
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