Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
