i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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