he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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