Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
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