Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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