my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
how drunk are you?
Several
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
