but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
