My first STD was from a foam party
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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