you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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