So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
