he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
