gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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