Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
You ruined the universe
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize