why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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