This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
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you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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