Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
