It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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