Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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