Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
