found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
