See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
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