it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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