I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Randomize