It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
We need to rekindle our bromance
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
