found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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