Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I should be sponsored by Trojan
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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