CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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