you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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