I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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