Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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