Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
Life is so much better after having sex.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
