we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
