i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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