A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
