this beer tastes like vomit already
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
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