i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
