Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
