She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
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